Potty Training Twins:Double the Pee!
Potty training is a concept that can induce fear, anxiety and a sense of confusion when it comes to a single toddler, let alone a set of twins! I have outlined my approach to potty training Ted and Erin after reading, researching and quite frankly, working it out as we went along. The first thing to know is this is not a quick process. Stock up your fridge with wine, because you are in for a bumpy ride. I initially saw the course, potty training in 3 days and thought, it can’t be that bad then. Now to be fair, mine were potty trained in 3 days and after a relapse on day 9, we are back to a dry day on day 10. That is with them wearing pants/knickers under clothes and me having to go back to an earlier step which is basically, me reminding them every 20ish minutes to sit on the potty.
My approach to potty training is not for the faint hearted, but I have got the results and this is with training both a boy and a girl at the same time. However, there are a few ways to approach potty training twins and my biggest advice is to go with the method and route that best suits you! If you find it easier to do one at a time, or if one twin is ready before the other, by all means go with that. There was a plethora of information out there from the intense behaviourist approach that I went with, to the gentle approach at the other end of the spectrum. For me, I decided to go with training at the same time in the hope my son, who was a little reluctant, would join in with his sister. However, I was fully prepared that if it was causing him too much distress or if he just wasn’t getting it, I would abandon ship and focus on my daughter. Luckily, he played along. I chose the behaviourist approach because for me, using a potty is simply a skill and can be learned. The understanding of when they need to go and listening to their own body would follow suit. There is nothing emotional about using a potty for me, it is simply a behaviour we all adopt to fit into society. It is more intense, but a quicker method.
Before you begin the potty training craze, you need to make sure you have these two things available or it will just not work.
They need to be ready and by ready, showing signs such as, telling you they have wet or soiled themselves or passing you a clean nappy to change them (Erin would actually tell me she had pooed and to change it!) Showing an interest in when you use the loo- because let's face it, we have all used the toilet with an audience of our twins.
2. A solid block of time where you can stay in the house.
Actually 3 things.. You definitely need two potties. They will on some occasion go at the same time and I originally only had 1 potty, so save yourself the agro, get two. I didn’t have 2 the same as I was donated a second one and by sheer luck, they both like a different potty each. You know your twins best and whether two the same causes less arguments.
I do however believe you can manipulate the first thing though. Around 18 months, my auntie brought the twins a potty and we just introduced it every now and then. We would role play teddies and dolls having a wee. We would let them sit on it (wearing a nappy still) and began talking about when we are ready, we can do wee wee and poo on the potty. They enjoyed this (good sign) and that was it for a while, just every now and then introducing the potty and talking about it. Soon after this, Erin and Ted started telling us when they had done a poo (another good sign) and continued to show some awareness of nappies and having been themselves.
As a teacher, I knew I would have a good block of time available in the summer and by then the twins would be a little over 2. This seemed like the right time for me to at least try some potty training. A few months before, I started laying the groundwork. I brought two potty training stories: Princess Polly and No More Nappies, which was about a boy and a girl using the potty so this was even better. I would read this with them a few times a week and we would talk about how they were going to use the potty soon. This was coupled with getting the potty out and role playing every now and then. When I decided to go ahead, I gave them some warning that we were going to use the potty soon and that they would wear big boy and girl pants like the book. I went to Sainsburys and we picked out some knickers and pants which we proudly showed off to everyone in the supermarket, and I made a transition to pull up nappies. To begin I just wanted to see if they were ready emotionally and physically and to keep the excitement of pants going. The great thing about pull up nappies is you can test if it is the right time without the accidents! So when we got home, I put them in pull up pants with their new knickers over the top. Every half hour or so, I would get them to pull their pants down and we would sit on the potty and see if they were happy to do so. If by some miracle they would use it, I made a big fuss - toddlers love a good bit of praise. Tester day was complete. They could pull knickers up and down, they were finding the potty fun, it was all systems go.
I trained the twins in stages, but had the same method throughout. My method was every 20- 30 minutes, tell them and guide them to sit on the potty and make a big fuss if they went. Day 1, I was a little sneaky and to really solidify we wee and poo here, if they did even the tiniest wee, I made a big fuss and gave them a chocolate button. By day 2 I scrapped the chocolate, because they had got the idea of sitting on the potty after a very intense day of taking them every 20- 30 mins. They coped with this well because a high 5 and big praise for going was still exciting enough. Now to help you along you need to give them extra drink for extra practice and you need a lot of patience because they will have a lot of accidents. We stayed in the kitchen and conservatory for 4 days because it is tiled floor and stocked up on kitchen towel and floor cleaner. We also had more TV on to help them sit and because being stuck in the same room was a hard slog on us all. I did try some garden time on the first day, but they were just peeing freely and so I decided to give it a few days until they had at least got used to the potty before we ventured outside.
Our schedule went like this:
Stage 1 - naked from the waist down - take them every 20- 30 mins and big praise when they use it. If they had an accident on the floor, tell them it doesn’t matter, keep trying. Erin smashed this within 2 days and started taking herself without prompting for both a wee and a poo, so by day 3 was ready for stage 2. Ted needed 4 days before he was ready
Stage 2 - introduce pants/knickers - now this can be where you come stuck again. Erin had a few accidents where she felt like she had a nappy on again, or just couldn’t get her knickers down in time. Still we told her it was ok, keep trying. To be fair, she understood straight away that she needed to get to the potty. Once they had cracked this (and you still may need to remind them every 20-30 mins) we ventured outside for some fresh air, carrying the potty with us.
Stage 3 - introduce shorts (as it was summer) Again you still need to be on top of reminding them. I fell into the trap of thinking they were just doing it on their own now and we had a few accidents because I stopped reminding them as much.
Stage 4 - Get out and about. I had a back pack full of clothes and pants, limited drink in the hour before we left and continued to take them to the disabled loo so that we could all fit in and sat them on the toilet every 20-30 mins whilst we were out.
To add to the madness, on day 2 of training I had to look after my sister’s kids at her house. I simply kept to my stage 1 method and brought our potties with us. Luckily for me, their youngest cousin still uses the potty too, so this was just more reinforcement.
After 5 days, we were pretty much there with reminding and with them taking themselves so we tried a short walk at the beach. (stage 4) I limited juice and water an hour before we left and made them sit on the potty before we left. We used dog training pads in car seats just in case, and as soon as we got to the beach, we used the public toilets (grim - but needs must.) We managed a little walk and ice cream and a wee on the beach before coming home dry again.
A day or so after that, I decided to take them for lunch - solo. I used the same method. Limited juice, made them sit on the potty before we left, went as soon as we got to the restaurant, still went every 20 mins when I was there and again, they stayed dry.
This is where we are now. Just shy of 2 weeks. We have managed trips to Grandma’s and my sisters - we just bring our potty with us; a beach walk, a walk in the countryside, a trip out to lunch and a 2 hour trip to the zoo, all of which they have remained dry. We stuck to the process of limiting drinks before, giving little sips at a time whilst out and continuing to take them every 20 - 30mins and yes, sometimes this meant in a bush!
I still use pull up pants for naps and night time; we are not ready for this step yet. Infact this will be my stage 5 and probably won’t be for a while. It is exhausting and intense, but we are getting there. I have also made a highlight of our journey on our instagram, @the_collaboration_twins
Whenever you decide to potty train and however you decide to do it, you got this. I won’t lie, it is the most intense time; it may even drive you to drink some nights. You will constantly be washing clothes, pants and wiping up wee, but we all have to learn some time I guess. Just make sure you are ready and they are ready because although you may feel like it is easier to give in and go back to nappies, push through if they are getting it, because eventually your life will get easier again.
